new blog

Hey guys!

My sister and I started a new blog! It's called RaRe Crochet. Check it out and follow it! I'll still be posting on here every now and then just to give an update on things not crochet related. Hope you enjoy our new blog!

Merry Christmas and have a Happy New Year!

God bless,

Rebecca

tis the season

Lots of happenings. Lots of goin' ons. As Christmas comes closer gifts have to be bought and gifts have to be made. School still needs to get done and the piano practiced. Books need to be read and that Latin grammar memorized. Looking forward to seeing my brother return from school, my sister from Uganda, and a new baby be born into the family. And through all of this I still find time to do lots of crocheting.
Making things like these:

Rachel also made some of these. We are starting up a little business together. It's called 'RaRe Crochet'. :)

Anyways, I thought it was time for a little update on the things in my life.

6. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?

Yes! Another question.

        This is definitely an easy question to answer. The hardest thing I have ever experienced is being diagnosed with cancer and having to go through the experience of chemotherapy. This happened 1 year and 3 months ago. Yes, I'm counting. The funny thing about all of this is that before I was diagnosed, the cancer didn't really give me any trouble or problems except for the fact that I had a sore arm for a long time. Chemotherapy was the main thing I struggled with, and I would say that this part is the harder experience. For me, as long as I'm alive I'm ok and this is a good thing. I didn't like the part where people were treating me as if I was on death's door. I told Mom, "I don't need people crying over me. I'm alive, I'm here, and I'm not dying." I might have looked like it, but this was because of chemo, steroids, surgeries, lack of sleep, and many other things. Yes, cancer was hard, but chemotherapy is harder. It might be hard to believe, but it's true. 

         I don't dwell on these things. Thankfully all these things happened quite a while ago already. I've just been thinking about them a little more lately because last year on October 31st I was an inpatient at the hospital. And Reformation Day (aka Halloween) is coming up soon and it has just reminded me of all the things that were going on back then. It's crazy that it has already been a year. 

        It has come to my attention from some people's questions that they didn't know if I am still on chemo or not. Yes, I am, and I have 9 months left. Hallelujah! I still go through rough patches where I have more intense side effects and this happens every 4 weeks after I go have a checkup and get an IV chemo. This "rough week" is actually right now. It started yesterday and from previous experience, I know that it will last till next week Wednesday. I figured it was time for another update on what has been happening in my life, hospital-wise. 

**Exciting news** 

I have another niece! She was born on October 6th. She was born to Benjamin and Christine and her name is Evelyn Rose. :)

summer life

I'm still doing that challenge!

What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?

***********

1. God is the Creator of the heavens and the earth and the beautiful sun that was shining outside.

2. My parents, brothers, sisters, in-laws, nieces, nephews, and the unborn babies.

3. Family vacation!! :D

4. Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet. 

5. My health.

***********

I am thoroughly ready for some rest and relaxation! I'm literally counting down the days till we leave for the Okanogan. Right now I'm not motivated at all to go back to school. After holidays, the motivation will set in, hopefully. :)

***********

71. Church family.

72. Beach days.

73. Chiropractor visits.

74. Ultimate frisbee nights.

75. Afternoon on the town with girlfriends.

76. Getting lost while hiking at Lynn Valley.

77. Opportunities to proclaim God's great protection over me. 

living in fast forward

Life has been busy, obviously, or else I would have posted a long time ago. This past week I went on a road trip with my two sisters and it was a LOT of fun. :) We went to Leavenworth, a cute little German town with lots of small shops to explore. We stayed there for one night and went to Omak the following afternoon. Omak is a very dead town with nothing to see. The only reason we went there was to go to the Omak Stampede and the World Famous Suicide Race. The name of the Suicide Race sounds horrible but it isn't as cruel as the name appears. It's just a race where a bunch of bareback riders race down a steep hill into the Omak River, cross the river as fast as possible and come into the arena. The first one across the finish line wins. No one got killed or injured.

I've been working on some crocheting projects.
I'm in the middle of making this right now:

Things are changing and life will never be the same again. Nathaniel is leaving for college to a far, far away land. He's going to Nashville, Tennessee. He's leaving very early Wednesday morning. Life is going to be very weird without him. Now there will only be 6. For many people, that is still quite a lot but for me that is a very small amount.


Seeing as I am living a normal life now and as I will be heading into Gr. 10 in school, I'm not sure how much time I will have to write. Maybe more, maybe less. Piano will also take up quite a bit of my time.

It has been over one year now and it all seems so surreal. This Saturday on August 18th, one year ago, I shaved my head...

...and I looked like this...

So many memories. During those times, I read Psalm 27 over and over again. It is definitely my favorite psalm.

The Lord is my light and my salvation;
Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the strength of my life;
Of whom shall I be afraid?
When the wicked came against me
To eat up my flesh,
My enemies and foes,

They stumbled and fell.
Though an army may encamp against me,
My heart shall not fear;
Though war may rise against me,
In this I will be confident.

HIPPOPOTO­MONSTRO­SESQUIPED­AL­IAN*

Life moves on and those special moments pass all too quickly. Trials and tribulations can either tear apart or pull people closer together. Now that this hardship is passing away from me, I can definitely say that I've become closer to all those that I call friends. God pulled me out of my little box and showed me what He thought was better for me. 


62. God's complete and ultimate control over my life.
63. That great, big ball of fire in the sky that lights up this world.
64. Joel. Sometimes you say the darndest and randomest things. :)
65. My parents. Happy Anniversary! :)
66. Annual church badminton tournaments.
67. Church picnics.
68. Ultimate frisbee in the blistering heat.
69. Elyse. I love that you often talk to yourself out loud. :)
70. For that one book that is so well written that it makes me cry.


Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears:


1. God. His great power and awe-inspiringness should incite fear in everyone.


2. The hospital. The first time I went to a hospital was to get an X-ray done. That experience was fine but after that it just went downhill. My tests started becoming more in-depth and extensive. My fear went so far that I vomited at the smell of the hospital parkade.


3. Jaywalking. I once started to run across the road, but I ended up falling flat on my face. My sis saved my life by stopping oncoming traffic, picking me up, and helping me the rest of the way. I laughed then and I laugh now, but I try my hardest to avoid jaywalking now.


I'm doing a 30 day challenge which is why I'm writing about all these random topics. I found the list on another lady's blog and I liked it. I won't be writing everyday because I don't have enough time for that. This is a great way for you to learn more about me. :)


*this word means "pertaining to a very long word." :D

Random facts and blessings.

20 Random Facts About Me!

1. I'm a Christian. I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and that He came to earth and died on the cross for my sins.
2. I have never been anywhere outside of North America.
3. I'm the eighth of 10 kids.
4. I enjoy cooking. Baking is okay, but cooking is better.
5. I hope to one day travel the east coast with Rachel.
6. A few times a week I always see the time 11:11 on the clock. It always reminds me of a really sad book I once read about a little girl with cancer.
7. I rarely ever buy anything for myself over $20.
8. At least once a week, I dream about hair.
9. Lately, I've begun to read Rachel's mind. I'll say things about stuff that she has been thinking. I think our brains are connected.
10. I'm on a "no refined sugar" diet.
11. I used to get storming mad when my siblings called me Becca Boo. Now I kind of enjoy it. :)
12. I have never ridden a horse by myself and it is something I really want to do.
13. I have been bald many times. For the first two years of my life and for the last half of my 14th year.
14. I always wanted to be able to experience everything for the first time over again. Watching my favorite movie for the first time again would be amazing. :)
15. Worms are disgusting. I have never liked them and never will.
16. I love to swim in cold/freezing water. Anything less than that is gross.
17. I have never been to the Greater Vancouver Zoo. This is very sad.
18. I never do school on Sundays.
19. I became an aunt at the age of eight. He was born two days after my birthday.
20. I had cancer. Not many girls my age can say that.

Some more of my blessings...
53. For the trees outside of my bedroom window.
54. Swing dancing with friends.
55. Dad. I love you.
56. A smiling baby.
57. Heart to heart talks.
58. Rach is now an 'N' driver. This is especially nice for me. :)
59. Coffee date with Rach.
60. Rach and I quoting one of our favorite movies together.
61. Driving in a torrential downpour with Rachel on our
second time out by ourselves. Scary.

mission accomplished.

done. finished. complete. terminated. accomplished. executed. etc. 
I started it about 2 years ago and then I forgot about it. About a week ago, Rachel reminded me of it and I decided I should finish it, and now it is done! Woohoo! Yeehaw! :) I feel a sense of pride in my accomplishment. 1 project down, 1 million more to go. At least that's what it seems like. 

My hands were shaking when I took the photo, so that is why it's not centered. ;)

Now to finish my school. If all goes well, I will be finished at the end of July. Gotta catch up on all the school I missed at the beginning of the year. Thankfully, it is raining so I don't actually want to be outside. 

Rachel came across this adorable picture and I couldn't resist putting it up...

Adorable!

productivity

I have been doing really well lately. I've been busy with school and I'm in the midst of doing a whole bunch of projects. I'm crocheting a baby blanket that looks like this:

I'm doing it with Rachel and the colors are blue and green with white trim. Canucks colors. So far it is looking pretty awesome. 

I'm also in the midst of sewing a 4 block quilt/wall hanging. I'm almost finished with it. I just have to sew the back and the trim on. I'm feeling really productive with all the stuff I'm getting done. 

45. Seeing a bird sitting on the back of a horse.

46. Sheared sheep. This marks the beginning of the summer for me, even if there is no sun.

47. Baking cupcakes and icing them with Rachel.

48. Being homeschooled. When I get chemo brain I get to read all day. :)

49. Psalm 27.

50. Rain. It makes doing school during the summer all the more bearable.

51. Thunder. It makes rain all the more endurable. 

52. Betty-Ann. 

Ok, so this isn't me obviously, but I found it and I thought it was pretty epic.

the long lost hat :)

**title that is catchy, and makes you want to read this post**

This is the worst time of month. I dread it. It's not like I get sick after going to the hospital but I do have some really bad memories of Children's hospital. Whenever I walk in there I get this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Let me just say that I'm glad I only have to go once a month. I'll be going there tomorrow. I went back on the chemo a week ago on half-dosage. 

Blessings:
28. God's Word - the Bible. 
29. The flowers blooming in the garden.
30. Mom.
31. Grandma.
32. Jonathan.
33. The smell of the early morning air.
34. Crisp, juicy, apples.
35. Having 2 ladies at different times in the same store tell me that they really like my hair.
36. Lots of laughter with my sisters.
37. A girls weekend away to Osoyoos.
38. All 3 of my married siblings expecting at the same time. :)
39. Seeing two brown bears on the way home from Osoyoos.
40. Playing cribbage with Jennifer.
41. Walking with Rachel.
42. Trying to talk in one-syllable words. 
43. Seeing a snake in the garden.
44. Finding a hat that I forgot I had and loving it all over again.


Count your blessings. They often come in disguises. 

Rachel and me

My hair is just a little bit longer than this. :)

summer, sun, and science :)

I had a wonderful time in Seattle. It was fun. It made me want to go away and have fun more often. :D I started piano lessons up again a few weeks ago. My hands and fingers feel so out of shape because I haven't practiced for quite a while. But it feels good to be playing and practicing again. It makes me happy.

Blessings:

8. gorgeous sunsets.

9. warm weather.

10. hot soothing tea.

11. doing well on my science test. 

12. having a lady at the store tell me that she liked my haircut.

13. healthy days.

14. fun weekends away.

15. good times with family and friends.
16. Rachel and Ethan.
17. the green grass.
18. having blood start squirting everywhere after getting my blood work done. :)
19. boring books.
20. the piano. 
21. rain, rain, and more rain.
22. birds chirping outside.
23. sun.
24. the newborn calf.
25. church.
26. fellowship.
27. because of low blood counts I haven't needed to be on my medication/chemo for the past 2 weeks and won't need to be on it for another week . Yay! :)


I started a notebook of my blessings. Every time I think of a new one I jot it down. That way I don't have to think of them on the spot when I write a new post. Join me in counting your blessings. They often come in disguises. 

count your blessings

I love this time of year! The sun, thundershowers, daffodils, the buds on the trees... it is all so beautifully gorgeous. My life seems to be getting better and better everyday. Next week I'm going away for a few days to Seattle with some of the family. It's going to be awesomely fun. On the 30th, my piano lessons are going to start up again. That's another thing that I'm super excited for. :)


It's has been 9 months to date since I was first admitted into the hospital. It has been a long journey. Sometimes a very hard and tough one, but I made it through and am sincerely thankful to God for his lovingkindness and faithfulness towards me.

There is sickness in the house. The stomach flu seems to be going rampant among those I know. It would be absolutely horrible if I get it. 

I got a beautiful card from the Wednesday Evening Prayer Group giving me a lot of encouragement to persevere and hold fast. Sometimes I get caught up in the future and start thinking about things that MIGHT happen and it just makes me really depressed, but then I realize once again that it's best to focus on the good and little things of life. I'm sure that God has a lot of things in store for me. There are probably even harder trials ahead. 

A good friend of mine and of the family inspired me to count my blessings. Sometimes they're hard to see, but the more you look for them the easier it gets. 

1.  I never realized how amazing school was until I was without it for 1/2 a year.
2. The joy of cooking dinner for the family. 
3. That amazing feeling I get after I've earned some money. 
4. The rain when it pours down and makes a ton of noise. :)
5. Amazing sisters that tease me way too much and way too often. I still love you though. :)
6. Brothers that make me feel special and make me cry just thinking of them. I don't think I've seen you guys cry as much as you did last July and August.  
7. Parents that are patient with me and that love me so much. I love you. 

Stay tuned for another post coming to you soon on your computer! ;)

"When I'm worried and I can't sleep
I count my blessings instead of sheep
And I fall asleep counting my blessings
When my bankroll is getting small
I think of when I had none at all

And I fall asleep counting my blessings" - Bing Crosby

trust in the Lord

It's that time again. I spent an hour on Thursday getting my checkup and routine drug. Afterwards, Mom and I spent some time visiting a good friend of ours and her son who was just diagnosed with a severe heart condition. He has been in the hospital since last Sunday. Prayer for healing and full recovery is appreciated. Please pray for peace for him and his family. You can read more about it here: http://flowersinhisgarden.blogspot.ca/

Sometimes the best thing to do is to pray...

...and to trust that He will answer your prayers. 

There isn't much to tell about myself except that I'm feeling great. My hair is growing quite fast. Sometimes it seems like it's growing really slow but others tell me that it's coming in fast. I really wish that the sun would come to stay because then I won't have to wear any toques or hats anymore. My head still gets cold so I still have to wear hats, even in the house. 

"There is one thing about baldness...

...it's neat." Don Herold said this and I completely agree. Not that I don't want it to grow back. It is certainly growing fast and it is very soft and feathery. :) Remember when I had only 2 lashes left? Well, my eyelashes are very full now and they are growing back nice and fast. At first, my eyebrows seemed to be coming in dark but now they've lightened up which I'm very happy about. I love my blonde hair and I would like to keep it. 


Everything is back to routine and I'm really happy about that. Never before did I realize how amazing routine can be. 5 days a month, I take a steroid. After coming off the steroid I feel really achy and drained of energy. This feeling usually lasts for a few days. So, right now I'm not exactly feeling very well. :( I'm sure that after it goes away I will be feeling great. The church dance is on Friday and I'm hoping that I will be feeling well enough to go. 


My appointment last Thursday at Children's went really well. It was nice and quick and I was out of there in an hour and a half. It was the quickest visit that I've ever had there. :) 


I don't care if they call me "baldie" or "chrome dome."  God took an eraser and brushed my head clean.  I'd rather be bald on top than bald inside.  ~Joe Garagiola

normalness and exciting news

Hey everyone!

So it has been awhile since I wrote here and that is because nothing has really happened. My life is full of everyday things such as school, reading, church, and normal stuff. I've gotten all my schoolwork back so that's keeping me pretty busy. One exciting thing has happened. This beautiful family is expecting another baby. :)

:D

:) The baby is due sometime near the end of September. I'm really, superly, duperly excited! I'm going to be an aunt 8 times over! It's absolutely crazy. I'm so happy for them. I don't really have a preference as to what I want the baby to be because they already have 2 girls and 2 boys.  

This Thursday I will be going to Children's Hospital to start Phase 5. Phase 5 will last for 1 1/2 years and so I will be finished in July of 2013. :) Checkups will be once a month with an IV chemo. I'm so glad that I'm on the last stretch to being REALLY finished. :)

I might be blogging a little less cause there is not as much to write about anymore.

I'm going to grow my hair really, really long and then I will cut it really short and donate it for cancer kids. I will never be scared of cutting my hair again because I will know how every style looks on me. :)

The amount of prayer and support I have had over the past 7 months has been overwhelming. I can't say enough how much I appreciate it. :)

normal stuff

I'm starting to get the tiniest bit of fuzz all over my head. :) I'm thinking that by May I will have a good full head of hair. The funny thing is, is that I need to get my passport photo taken in the next 2 months and if I get it taken while I'm bald then it's going to be on my passport for the next 4-5 years. :) Elyse thinks that I should get it taken being bald so that I can get the pity of the border guards for the next few years. :) I might wear my wig but it is so uncomfortable that I can't even wear it for more than 5 minutes.

My cold has finally disappeared for the most part. Thankfully. Having a month-long cold is not fun.

I met some people yesterday who have been praying for me and reading my blog for the last 1/2 year. It's really amazing to meet people who already know you and pray for you because they've read your blog, but whom you've never actually met before. :)

There are no words to express my happiness.

I’m done!!! :) Hallelujah! Praise be to God! I’ve been looking forward to this moment ever since it all started and now that it is here it doesn’t seem real to me. It is only by God’s grace and the prayers of His people that I’ve made it through the intense part. I’m so thankful that I’ve not gotten sick with the flu even though I have a bad cold, hopefully it doesn't get worse. It is such a pain having this never-ending cold because my immune system isn’t strong enough to kill it. :(

I’m going to have a total of 3 ½ weeks off of everything.  I do not have to head back to Children’s till March 1^st. :) In the future I will go to Children’s once a month for a checkup and an IV drug.

Because of the last drug I took, my counts are quite low right now. This afternoon I got a 'hemogoblin' transfusion. It was about 5 hrs long. I feel so much better after I get a transfusion. It's amazing how a few extra blood cells can make you feel a lot more energized. 

This might sound weird to people who hate doing school but I'm really looking forward to doing school everyday and getting all my subjects back. :) I miss doing school and being able to think. :)

On a more serious note: I do know that my life will never be the same again and I need to stop wishing for it to be. I will always be a different person and I know that this lymphoma cancer will probably effect the way I live the rest of my life. There is nothing I can do about this and I guess I just have to accept the facts as they are. 

Just so you know my hair has not started to grow back yet but hopefully sometime soon. :)

Zero more days left. :D

:) :) :) :) :)

I can't seem to wrap my head around the fact that all my intense chemo will be over on Friday! The more I think about it the more excited I become. This has been the fastest winter I have ever lived through. Life is going to be so easy and normal after this. Now I can go back to all the stuff that I love to do. :) No more long drives into Vancouver every week. No more lumbar punctures. No more mouth sores or any of that junk. But I will have to be really strict in taking all my chemo pills every day without skipping because otherwise there is a large chance of the cancer coming back (please pray for diligence).

For the next couple weeks my counts are going to be extremely low and I'm going to be susceptible to all kinds of germs. I will probably have to stay away from as many crowds as possible.

I keep praying that my hair will grow back really fast. I really, REALLY miss it. I'm sort of getting sick of  having to a put a hat on every time I go anywhere. Ethan told me tonight, "You are going to be so WEIRD with hair!" :)

COUNTDOWN: TWO days left. :D I am extremely happy.

Fun fact of the day: I only have two lashes left on the bottom lid of my right eye. :) 

8 days of chemo left = happiness

Has it really been 6 months since all this began? I was reading all my previous posts from when this all started and it's amazing how much stuff I have learned. Now I understand so much better what is going on and what is going to happen. Time has gone by so fast that is seems like everything I wrote about a few months ago JUST happened. 

Today I will be at Children's all day from 8.00 a.m. to about 5.00 p.m.. It's going to be a long day. I will be getting three different chemo drugs including another lumbar puncture. I can't wait till this day is over. :(

I have another prayer request. I now have a bad cold and I really do not want it to turn into anything worse like a fever or an infection. Hopefully it will go away before my blood counts drop like crazy in the next 2 weeks. 

After everything is done in a couple weeks I'm going to have a party. A BIG one... to praise God for His wonderful mercy towards me and because I had a birthday. I still have to get through the next two weeks but I'm happy that there are only two weeks left.

Instead of months and weeks we are now down to a countdown of days. 

COUNTDOWN: Eight days of chemo left. 

:)

1 Chronicles 29: 12-13 - "12 Both riches and honor come from you, and you rule over all. In your hand are power and might, and in your hand it is to make great and to give strength to all. 13 And now we thank you, our God, and praise your glorious name." 

birthdays, snow, and cool stuff...

I'm fifteen. My birthday was on Sunday and I had a really nice day with my family. At church after the service everyone sang Happy Birthday to me. :) It was slightly embarrassing but I was told that I didn't even blush. All my brothers, sisters, sisters-in-law, brother-in-law, and nieces and nephews came over after church for lunch to help celebrate with me. The nice thing about having a big family is that you get lots of presents whenever it comes to your birthday. :) I was totally spoiled. It's tradition that whenever a girl turns 15 we get a fancy ring. My birthstone is a Garnet but I don't really like that color so Mom and Dad gave me a December one which is a Blue Topaz. It's a really pretty light blue color. I also got an ice cream maker. Now I can make my own fancy ice cream. :) I got a scarf that came straight from Guatemala. I got some earrings and a jewelry box for the earrings. I got a hoodie and leg warmers. I also got a shower sponge, some Burt's Bees lip balm, and some pj's. I always get the best birthday presents because my birthday is the 1st one of the year for our family. :)


In the afternoon I got a really nice surprise. My piano teacher surprised me by dropping by to wish me a Happy Birthday and she gave me a gorgeous bouquet of roses. It really made my day. She stayed and had dessert with us and we were able to visit for a while. 

Ok. Enough of the birthday stuff. My mouth is almost completely healed. I can talk normally again and I can eat real food again. I've had enough of smoothies and soup and blended food. Chemo has been cancelled for this week and I will start next Tuesday. I just need some time for my body to finish healing up and get back to its normal self before it gets attacked again. Some more good news is that next week Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday I can go to Abbotsford Hospital for my chemo instead of going to Children's. Yay!

Guess what?!? It finally snowed. We have about a foot of snow at my place.  

Only two weeks of chemo left starting next Tuesday. The end is finally in sight. 

prayer request

I know I just wrote on Sunday but I've been having some problems and I think it best if everyone knows. I have major mouth sore problems and so far it hasn't been getting any better. It is so bad that my diet has consisted of smoothies and blended soup. It is very hard to open my mouth. They will postpone my chemo if it is still really bad by Monday. Please pray that it wouldn't get any worse and that my mouth would heal quickly. 

I went to Children's today and received the drug that makes my hair fall out for the last time. Now my hair can grow back for good. That's one thing to be happy about. :) At least I can still smile even if it's hard to talk and eat! 

Thanks for your prayers. It is greatly appreciated. 

The end is near!

It's been over a week since I've written and I must say that life has been going fairly well. My hair fell out again, sadly, and my cheeks have puffed out again but I'm off the steroid now so my cheeks will deflate again in a couple weeks. This past week I was feeling quite exhausted and achy all the time so I was taking naps a lot, but that is going away now. 


On Tuesday I have to go in for just a short chemo drug. For the following two weeks I will get chemo every day from Monday to Thursday. The doctors are expecting that I might get sick due to low blood counts which would really suck. If I get sick it means that everything will get postponed. :/ I thank God every day for bringing me this far without any major complications. Please pray that I don't get sick. 

 School has started up again and I've been doing some Algebra. I'm also going to be doing a writing course for the next couple months which will challenge me a little bit because when I have "chemo brain" my brain absolutely does not work at all. I can't even do a few math problems in a row before I get stuck and have to try something else. I've also been doing Physical Science this year :). The doctors say that they they will sign for a credit in science because of all the amount of information I've learned this year about cancer and hospital stuff. 

Count down: 3 weeks left of intense chemo. After this I will be taking oral chemo for a year and a half during which I will go in once a month for an IV chemo.